Finding Love as Gen Z

The way people fall in love seems to be shifting gears, generation after generations. Whilst our grandmas believed in total submission to the men they are dating, that’s hardly the case for the recent generations.

The same can also be said about our grandpas who valued being the center of providence and security. A typical 2024 relationship will see a man vouching for ‘going dutch’ kind of relationship.

Gen Xers leaned into the pop psychology that men were from Mars and women were from Venus; for Zs, the gender divide is more red versus blue.

Gen Z standing on their business

According to new research coming out of Stanford, a stark ideological divide is emerging between the genders as Gen Z women globally become more progressive, while their male counterparts get more conservative.

Gen Z are seen to be vocal with their choices, their value and what they stand for. They seem to know exactly what they want from a relationship – not influenced by the societal expectations.

They emphasize on putting themselves first, setting boundaries, and expressing their true selves. It’s no surprise that Gen Z views being honest and transparent about dating intentions to be the most important dating red flag.

Gone are the days when being single past a certain age carried a stigma or was viewed as a sign of failure. Today, an increasing number of men and women are choosing to navigate the dating world on their own terms, unburdened by expectations to settle down.

The rise of technology and social media has drastically changed the way people interact and form relationships. It has dumped many into having a sense of disconnection and difficulty in forming meaningful connections.

Alternative to dating apps

In  a recent report, GenZ and Millennials are said to have started to think beyond dating apps when looking for love. It appears Gen Z and millennials are now hanging out at book clubs. Safe to say, the concept has picked up pace in recent times.

Finding love at a book club is akin finding it at church or at a a themed event. You are sure they somewhat share a particular value with you. Also, these social gatherings become a great spot to break the ice and engage in lively intellectual conversation rather than wait to match with your ‘right’ partner on a dating app only based on surface-level criteria such as hobbies or preferences.

Peculiar as it may seem, different people prefer to find their partners in particular settings. And there are those settings where some would admit they can never forage for love. This might seem as if its in our control, but its more attributed to fate than intentionality.

Gen Z are perhaps the generation whose love lives have been most overexposed, put under the magnifying glass by social media and thousands of think pieces. Despite the hot takes on how Gen Z are leading their ways of life – both career-wise and relationship-wise, they come about as the woke generation that choses not to be tied down by the beliefs that they found there.

Safe to say, they are reinventing the wheel.

Changed dynamics

In previous generation, there was not much exposure for learning new habits, there was no social media to influence them. So, whatever they learnt was either from their parents or close surroundings.

Their parents taught them to adjust and sacrifice in a relationship, which are two important aspects for a successful marriage, however this sacrifice was mostly expected from women. But the age was innocent, and marriage was a sacred and a big thing, back then.

So, people fell in love easily as the expectations and demands were less. But then, movements of women empowerment started which was needed at that time.

However, the case scenario lies on the fence and comes out quite debatable. And social media doesn’t seem to ease the pressure bestowed in relationships. These days, people become hysterical if they don’t exchange multiple texts daily with the person they are dating. No text can be unanswered longer than a couple of hours or they are on a WhatsApp group asking if this is good enough reason to dump their current squeeze.

Hook up culture

Even as that progresses, the hook up culture also seems to be a ‘thing’ in the current relationship sphere. People don’t want, rather seem not interested, to commit to a long term dating. They would rather have flings and move until they feel ready to now settle down.

This might have an impact on those who are at their era of finding genuine love. They worry of falling for someone who might not be interested in commitment, or at least not intentional with the relationship.