Take them off

I wake up to a voice that disturbs me.I am sweating from the thoughts that approach me.These demons surround me and the worst thing,is that i allow them to dwell in me.I seek my soul to find answers that will help me undetstand.My sorrow tries to fight the joy that my surroundings give.I am trapped and i don’t even know whether i want to be found.The anger that dwells in me is enough to move a building.I think that everyone and everything is at fault and i try to push them away.I let them define my destiny and let my dreams fade away.

It is at night and i don’t find sleep.I have anxiety that breeds in me.This is not the life i choose to live.Am afraid that my thoughts will come to surpass me.Should i tell the one who will listen to this tale that my words defeat me?Will i overcome the voices that stop me from speaking out loud only to be loud in my mind?

I start to shiver when i think of whom am made to be.The person that the almighty molded was never meant to suffer from this.I keep on telling my soul that He who died for me has forsaken me.I try to make sense that am still a child worth saving.This time i decide that he who enslaved me will not win.For twenty four years of living,i have never been alive.

I am embarrassed of the person i have become.I used to love the reflection i saw but now i cannot even open the door to grow.I can’t tell you how much mother cried for my redemption.All i saw is a lady trying to mold me to perfection.Papa never had more than ten words to alter to any one.I saw him kneel for hours to find me a solution.

I’m glad that He who bargained for my existence did not forsake me.It’s grace that defended me from the person i wanted to be.He reminded me that on the cross He had me in mind.The blood shade was meant to heal me.He whispered love into my unforgiving soul.He touched my cold heart with his everlasting sword. That whoever trys to take me from him will remain defeated at the cross that he died for me.I breath in hatred but His love for me gave me breath.I fought to be away from Him but i was desperate to have Him. My frustrations were directed to the things He did not do for me,instead of focusing on what He did right for me

Take them off.The anger,off.The frustrations,off.The disperacy,off.The rejection,off.The blame game,off.Take them off because the one who choose to die for your sins bore the pain so that you will not have to suffer.Take them off because He who seats at the throne will forever be God.He did not watch His only son humiliated so that you can be ashamed of Him.Let Him harvest your soul and know that you can be remade.