NEVER BE SO SURE

If I had lied to my wingman, Chiwambo, that I was busy I couldn’t join him in the usual evening girls-hunt, then you wouldn’t be reading this. We had made it a habit to pick up ladies in the cool breeze of the eventides. At times, I could forge a tight schedule just so I escape the rejections that accompanied these ‘hyena’ evening sprees.

We had mastered the roads that these ladies liked to pass, the shops they bought their stuffs and even the timing.

On this evening, Chiwambo psyched me up to approach Letween Mlambo, a crush that could directly win Miss Zimbabwe if she ever contested. She gave me sleepless nights – any blogger out here can testify. Chiwambo had insisted that Letween always gave me a a certain incomprehensible look that meant we were feeling the same way. He even added that Letween was nursing a heartbreak and it could be easier for me to win her – I just had to play a Mr nice guy act. Was Chiwambo just psyching me up? No, this guy was never wrong on his words.

I had seen Letween copious times at school. It’s hard to not notice a beautiful girl in MSU (Midlands State University.) Most of them hide in troups of other girls as they break for lunch, a few walk alone – the likes of Letween ‘Tendai’ Mlambo.

You meet these troups in the varsity premises and the moment you look back to confirm their backyard’s sizes, you meet their eyes looking at yours too; well, okay. Unlike them, Letween always had her headphones on, minding her playlist.

She had her standards put together, chilled, with beauty oozing all over her. So far, we only had one thing in common, maybe two – we liked eating at Hungry Bear restaurant and we both had feelings for each other. The latter was courtesy of Chiwambo. She had been our target for days. We had mastered her moves so well, so well that we could predict how her day would be.

I was reluctant to approach her, with reasons well known to me. You see, you just don’t approach a lady that has the confidence to walk alone. These are the ones who serve rejection in silver platters. These are the ones that are comfortable being alone, and they view relationships as traps of inconvenience to them. But where I come from, we just don’t give up that easily! If we die, we die!

Chiwambo was good at convincing and giving hopes, it’s no doubt that he is pursing a marketing course. The last thing he wanted to see is me getting Letween’s number and prove to him that I had game. No man wants to look inferior and since money is the best motivation, we ended up betting.

I walked to the counter, where she was hanging her entrancing physique as she waited for her order. I fished out a few dollars then slapped the counter table with them. “Get her whatever she wants,” I said to the cashier. Letween turned to look at me, I looked back. Eye to eye now, for the first time. She then rummaged her purse and slid her debit card to the cashier, then whispered, “Did someone lie to you I can’t afford my bills? Sorry!”

“No … but … I was…” I stuttered.
” Neeeeeh!… I’m not those cheap ladies that you entice with money here in Mutare. I have a boyfriend that can do all that, boy bye!”

Her words bruised my ego so bad. I felt my confidence sink in abyss. In all the rejections I had faced, this qualified for a Guinness World Book of Records. I made the wrong approach, or maybe I found her in wrong moods. But didn’t Chiwambo say she looks at me suggestively, and that she was nursing a heartbreak that was to give me an upperhand? Huh?