It Ended Before it Began

It all began in church. Just like any other love story it began with exchanging contact, long hours on a phone call, sweet talks(which are absolutely what we know our partners desire to hear), caring, faking personalities and behavior, promising to give each other another heaven on earth. Funny enough that’s when you realise everyone is a script writer because of the imaginary love we all promise our partners and see ourselves in.

They say if you want a wife or a husband, the church is the best place to find one huh! Ben and I were true believers of that saying, from that you could tell that we were culture minded. The first month of us getting to know each other, things went on smoothly I never found Ben with any mistake and neither did he. In deed Ben had the qualities I pictured my prince charming; tall of course I wanted someone who I would stretch to get a kiss and not the other way round, hardworking, caring and smart; mostly in mathematics because I wanted him to be able to calculate the degree of my madness and the percentage of love I had towards him so that he may not excuse himself for not noticing or not knowing.

We had our schedule set, Friday night was always our ice cream date. Saturday evening was our choma date which meant the whole weekend I was to sleep at his place. Ben was one sweet guy I can say he knew how to love differently. From his kitchen skills to swiping his card for his woman huh! Ben used to prepare breakfast and wake me up with a morning kiss on my neck then carry me to the bathroom followed by a nice hot shower. I was slowly falling for Ben. Believe me, no man had ever done these things; it was always the other way round. My love for him grew stronger each day to a point I even loosen up. Of course I wouldn’t have had any regrets because I was conscious free with all my actions.

Three months later things were still okay Ben is sweet as obvious. One thing that excited me most with Ben was the fact that he changed my name to wifey; from how he had saved me to how he introduced me to his friends and his actions. He was open with his plans, salary and long term investments. I had hundred percent trust I was his rib. Who would have had second thoughts after someone has placed you in such a position?.

So this one Friday Ben never texted nor called. It really got me worried because it wasn’t obvious of Ben to start a day without communicating. It was noon and as obvious we used to meet around 6pm at our usual spot. I tried calling his number several times he was off. I called later around 5PM, probably earlier he was charging his phone – I thought, his phone was still off . I went to my house, took a shower as I was waiting for him to respond at least to tell me ‘hey babe I’ve been held up with work I wasn’t able to communicate’. I was trying to stay positive because I knew I had nothing to worry about.

I couldn’t take it anymore, I dressed up and boarded a cab to his place. I opened the gate went straight to the door this time round there was another different car in front of his door. I walked towards the door and I first inhaled and exhaled. Just before I knocked a different woman opened the door. She was in her middle thirties, she greeted me and welcomed me in without hesitation. I walked in still wondering what’s going on. The lady looked at me and what I noticed was her eyes, they seemed a bit disappointed. She offered me a glass of juice and asked me calmly what brought me to her house. That statement hit me with shock. I even didn’t know what to ask nor say, at Some point I thought she had poured hallucination pills in my drink because literally I was the one supposed to ask her why she was in my man’s house.

For the first time I remained silent without a response for almost ten minutes. My big mouth couldn’t shut up I even told her how I’m the wife to be of the owner of the house. Just before I finished my statement, she busted out with a sarcastic laugh that made me feel like the smallest thing. She laughed her lungs out because of my statement. She then said to me sarcastically, “young dreamer, the guy you are talking about was my watchman and I had left him in charge of my home though I just fired him this morning. He is now on his way to his family in Bungoma.”

I fell on my knees as tears rolled down my cheeks, my heart is pinched with pain and my mind is reading regrets but still in denial of the woman’s words. I left and went to my house with questions that I couldn’t answer.
After a week of sobbing I began feeling weird. I mean, Sickly. I went to the hospital to find out what could be the problem.
Right after the doctor carried out different tests, he gave me two sheets that, I tested HIV positive and pregnant all at the same time.

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